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The law will tell you I entered adulthood at age 18. I’m not sure that’s true. It wasn’t until I was 20 and mattress shopping at Ikea that I felt like an actual grown-up.
Mom wasn’t there to help me pick it out, and Dad wasn’t there to pay for it. That was probably for the best, though. My parents still sleep on a waterbed.
Thanks to several moves, a breakup and buying my first house, I have since bought a few more mattresses. Still, there are several things I wish I’d known before I bought each of them.
If you don’t have the good fortune of running into Amy Schumer — who bought an employee a mattress…
